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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26511118">of heroes &amp; headaches</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/ayobaby/pseuds/ayobaby'>ayobaby</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Compilation of Final Fantasy VII, Crisis Core: Final Fantasy VII</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>ASGZC, Attempt at Everything, Attempt at Humor, College AU, RVERYBODY SAY ASGZC, WAKE ME UP WAKE ME UP INSIIIIIIDE, are we here only 2 suffer, lq self indulgent, no ships bc i genuinely believe they could have been siblings in another life, roommate au, ssssssssssh, this is so bad lmao - Freeform, yeeeeeeeeah</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-09-27</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-10-29</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-18 08:27:55</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>4</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>3,411</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26511118</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/ayobaby/pseuds/ayobaby</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>[ cloud strife didn't really know what to expect from his new campus, his new roommates and his new life but he was starting to wish that he could get a refund. ]</p><p>collection of drabbles<br/>NOT IN CHRONOLOGICAL ORDER!</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>7</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. cloud has motion sickness, sephiroth has a headache & zack is zack</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>man im pulling stuff out of my arse at this point uhhhhhhh</p><p>lowercase intended bc i like 2 be aesthetic w my fanfics</p>
    </blockquote><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>”someone will die.” ( the silver haired man's grunt of approval was mildly terrifying and promising. )</p><p>”of fun!” </p><p>cloud sighed.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>yo i forgot what sound a car horn makes so i had 2 go search it up wtf</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“this is terrible.” cloud informed. he was promptly ignored. “kid, sometimes you have to see the bigger picture!” zack exclaimed, shaking his hands for extra effect. from somewhere behind the duo, sephiroth groaned.</p><p>“zack put your hands back on the steering wheel or so help me—“</p><p>”dude how did you even fucking know, <em>your eyes are closed</em>—“</p><p>”<em>ZACHARY!</em>”</p><p>the dark haired man relented.</p><p> </p><p>the day had started off well enough. by their standards, anyway. cloud awoke to sephiroth investigating the toaster. when questioned, all he responded with was a sharp “zack likes breaking things.” which told cloud all he needed to know for the day. the blond was ready enough to just get back into bed and lament over his roommates’ - or self proclaimed elder brother in zack's case, though he suspected sephiroth felt the same - chaotic actions. zack fair had other plans however. plans which he wanted to drag his beloved roommates into. so he did. and now they were parked outside of an amusement park.</p><p>sephiroth, who had already began nursing the beginnings of a headache after fixing the toaster, deigned to stay home. but that simply was not allowed in the puppy-man's books and after a singular pout, they all got dressed immediately and filed into the car. then came the argument of who would drive. their usual contender was out with his steadily worsening headache. cloud offered just so they could be spared of the casual road laws zack lived to break but he was shut down by both men. ‘stupid overprotective asswipes.’ he had grumbled silently. so zack drove. and it sucked. for every party involved. </p><p>back to the scene. cloud gingerly stepped out, casting a worried glance back at sephiroth. “seph doesn't look so good, maybe we should do this another day—“ “what sephy needs,” zack began firmly - ignoring the man in question's violent hiss at being called ‘sephy’ - “is a day off.” cloud rolled his eyes.</p><p>”someone will die.” ( the silver haired man's grunt of approval was mildly terrifying and promising. )</p><p>”of fun!” <br/><br/>cloud sighed.</p><p> </p><p>zack readily hauled sephiroth out of the backseat and held him bridal style. “what the fuck does angeal make you do?” cloud questioned, impressed. the older man grinned. “all part of training, spike. and now i'm super strong!” he flexed his muscles. the man in his arms was decidedly not as awestruck as cloud. “zack, shut up.” sephiroth commanded. “yes sir.” he obeyed immediately. cloud sniggered. sometimes the older man really did live up to his nickname of ‘trained puppy’.</p><p>they decided to check out the rides first, much to sephiroth's chagrin. cloud suggested ‘bahamut mountain’ — a non perilous ride filled with sharp and abrupt twists and turns. it would be the perfect ride to test out the silver haired man's endurance, it would satisfy zack and if sephiroth vomited— well . . . cloud would not be in range, that's for sure. the other two agreed without much thought.</p><p>”hey, cloudy, i'll bet you’re glad we came here now, right? look at this view, it's fucking awesome!”</p><p>”zack, don't swear, there are children on this ride.”</p><p>”sorry seph. man, you don’t look so good. are you sure you can—“</p><p>”yes, i'll be fine. now be quiet and let everyone listen to the safety instructions.”</p><p>the blond had only vaguely been listening to his roommates’ conversation, much more absorbed in securing his seatbelt and wondering how many limbs would be twisted grossly if he were to fall from this height. the ride started off slow enough and cloud was almost beginning to enjoy it. he wisely tuned out zack and sephiroth ( the three person per row seating arrangement had him sitting on the left, zack in the middle and sephiroth on the right ). just as cloud was beginning to truly relax, bahamut mountain decided to live up to its legendary namesake and, quite frankly, went ballistic.</p><p>he could not even begin to count how many times they twisted and lunged and were almost thrown out of their seats ( and probably would have been sent flying if it weren’t for their tight restraints ). in his anxiousness to ensure sephiroth didn't puke on him, he forgot that he, cloud strife, had motion sickness. a startling fact which soon presented itself onto zack's lap. </p><p><br/>“<em><strong>OH MY FUCKING SHIVA</strong></em>”</p><p>“what is it zack— oh dear.”</p><p><em>“<strong>SEPHIROTH </strong><strong>FUCKING HELP ME</strong></em>”</p><p>“that's quite a lot, where does he store all of that in his body? i simply— <em>zachary don't move you'll make it worse</em>—“</p><p>“<em><strong>WHAT THE FUUUUUUUCK</strong></em>”</p><p>“<em>ZACHARY!</em>”</p><p> </p><p>they all found themselves filing back into the car, zack cheerily throwing his vomit-stained shorts into the trunk. sephiroth's headache had magically subsided and cloud found himself lying down in the backseat this time, miserably crushing an empty water bottle between his hands. “it's alright spike, no harm done,” zack began gently. “though you really should have told us you had motion sickness.” the silver haired man added. the youngest of the three grumbled. “i forgot.” he eventually answered. sephiroth hummed.</p><p>the ride home was silent for once. as sephiroth pulled into the driveway ( zack was banned from even looking at steering wheels ), the dark haired man chuckled and rummaged in his pocket. “guys, look!” he breathed out between snickers. the other two men took their sweet time staring at the photograph in his hands. it was their disastrous ride captured for all to see, with a trembling cloud guiltily emptying the contents of his stomach onto a wailing zack's lap. sephiroth was hovering next to zack, his face uncharacteristically distressed. <br/><br/></p><p>“can't wait to show ‘geal!” the puppy-man declared. cloud only needed two seconds to decide his next course of action. he lunged for the photo, remnants of nausea long forgotten. zack responded by nearly tearing the car door off and rushing inside, screeching for genesis rhapsodos to “SAVE ME! SAVE ME GEN, SAVE ME!”</p><p>sephiroth blinked twice, sighed, blinked again and then made up his mind. he violently lurched forward onto the steering wheel and the car horn blared. </p><p>
  <strong><br/>HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONK!</strong>
</p><p>”GIVE ME THAT PHOTO ZACK! GIVE IT TO ME SO I CAN DESTROY IT—“</p><p>”NO I WON'T LET YOU HARM COOKIE, HE HAS FEELINGS—“</p><p>”WHY ARE YOU NAMING THE DAMN PHOTOGRAPH, HAND IT OVER MOTHERFUCKER—“</p><p>”NO MEANS NO, CLOUD! CONSENT IS IMPORTANT!”</p><p>”infinite in mystery is the gift of the Goddess—“</p><p>“<em>SHUT UP GENESIS!</em>”</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. genesis needs some sleep. please sleep. genesis. please.</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>“and i think you—“</p><p>”genesis, we already know what you think, thank you.”</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>EVEYRBODY SAY ASGZC YEAH ASGZC</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“genesis.” came a warning hiss. ah, angeal sucked sometimes. that man really had no sense of humour, honestly. and to think he felt he couldn’t trust genesis. why the ever living fuck could he not? he was great, funny, charming, engaging, spectacular, marvellous, educated, stunning—</p><p>“gen!” oh, so now the puppy was getting involved. he paid zack fair no mind, taking care not to stare at his face. puppy's pouts were absolutely deadly and he refused to let himself fall victim once more. fool me once, shame on you. fool me twice, shame on me. though genesis rhapsodos didn't really do shame so he wasn’t sure if the saying could apply here. maybe—</p><p>“genesis.” that would be sephiroth. “what!” he snapped waspishly. the only response to his edgy tone was a delicately raised silver brow. “i think you need to sleep.” sephiroth declared. “and i think you need to fuck the <em>fuck</em> off—“ the final “genesis!” came from a high pitched scandalised tone. cloud. he rolled his eyes and whirled to face the youngest of their rag-tag group.</p><p>the urge to say ‘that's my name, don't wear it out.’ was oddly disturbing but he refused to lower himself to zack's level. so genesis rhapsodos settled for a borderline haughty sniff, pointedly ignoring the growing crease on angeal's forehead ( a tell-tale sign that he was ready to whoop ass ). to his credit, cloud didn't look as bothered as he sounded. “i think you should sit down.” he suggested demurely, his voice drastically different from before.  the redhead huffed.</p><p>“and i think you—“</p><p>”genesis, we already know what you think, thank you.” angeal interrupted steadily. he then proceeded to pick up the shorter man, carefully throw him over his shoulder and march up the stairs. genesis wasted no time in banging his fists against his childhood friend's back. zack almost shrieked in delight and followed after them, dragging cloud by the wrist. only sephiroth opted to stay back, seemingly nursing the beginnings of a headache. after a few minutes of steady climbing, he ceased assaulting angeal and settled for glaring at ‘mr gongaga’. </p><p>zack cheekily winked back at him. cloud sighed. “how's it hanging, gen?” the dark haired man dared to ask, ignoring his mentor's warning groan and cloud's 72nd sigh of the day. genesis was not amused. they'd disembarked onto the second floor of their shared house and the youngest was beginning to look a little weary. “you running out of steam, spike?” and with that light question, zack proceeded to hold the blond bridal style. now it was finally genesis' turn to snicker.</p><p>he waved at cloud teasingly. “first time?” the redhead gestured. the younger man only crossed his arms and huffed, lips curled into a rough imitation of a pout. they could all hear sephiroth moving about in the kitchen downstairs which reminded genesis that he had been in a state of indignation. before he could resume his fist-fest, he was set down. “did you read my mind?” he deadpanned, ignoring zack's little ‘oof!’ as he ( and cloud ) rammed into angeal's back. </p><p>angeal smirked, eyes twinkling, before he shook his head. “no, i just know you gen.” he replied simply before shoving genesis into a room. oh, not just any old room. “now go the fuck” - zack let out another delighted shriek, causing the man in his arms to wince - “to sleep, rhapsodos. that's an order.” he continued sternly. the redhead rolled his eyes. “alright, calm down commander hewley, don't pull out the—“ </p><p>“rhapsodos.” </p><p>“fucking fine!”</p><p>he didn't actually move though. genesis crossed his arms and began to glare his childhood friend down who returned his hard stare full force. he didn’t dare to take his eyes off angeal but he could hear zack shifting uncomfortably, backing out of the room ( cloud still in his arms ). “you're tired, gen,” the gentle giant tried softly. he harrumphed, neither denying or confirming. “i think you need to rest a little. you've been overworking yourself, <em>don't think we haven’t noticed</em>—“ angeal finished sharply as he saw how genesis opened his mouth to interrupt. subdued, the redhead looked away. </p><p>“we just want what's best for you.” he pressed on. a light scowl twisted genesis' lips. the stubborn man was unwilling to back down so easily but he saw reason in angeal's pleading. “i'll rest my eyes, but i'm just resting them, okay?” he relented finally. angeal's warm smile was almost worth sacrificing his pride. almost. “just resting my eyes, you hear me, no sleeping—“ genesis continued fiercely. his childhood friend chuckled knowingly and nodded. “yes, i know gen. just resting.”</p><p>”good.” and with a self satisfied nod, genesis rhapsodos closed his eyes ( to rest them! ) and promptly fell asleep. and if he heard an extremely excited zack fair attempt to steal his least favourite silk-bound copy of LOVELESS, he sure as hell didn’t show it. </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. or i won't give you anything!</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>“how did you—“ </p><p>“a magician never reveals his secrets.”</p><p>”sephiroth, you aren’t a magician.”</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>sephiroth and cloud had been hard at work, rummaging through the shared box of CDs. they were both home alone for the first time in forever ( angeal was at work, genesis was out with a friend and zack . . . well, zack was somewhere ) and decided to seize this golden opportunity. mr rhapsodos zealously guarded this box of memories and it was very, very difficult to even glance at it in his presence.</p><p>cloud sat back, winded. “have you found anything?” he directed at sephiroth. the silver haired man hummed and bobbed his head slightly, too focused on shifting through countless CDs. the blond decided to close his eyes and rest for a little. he was already bone tired from a busy day on campus and it was the older man's idea to infiltrate the box in genesis' absence. cloud was convinced that he lived to royally piss off the redhead and then blame it all on zack. sometimes he wondered if—</p><p>“aha!” sephiroth spoke, breaking through cloud's wandering thoughts. he narrowed his eyes at the silver haired man who now wore a triumphant smile. in his hands was a silver CD. on further inspection, cloud realised the CD had a neon sticky note attached. in big, bold letters was written ‘<strong>AGZ</strong>’. “AGZ?” the younger questioned, confused. sephiroth simply nodded. cloud started once more when the CD player seemingly materialised out of nowhere.</p><p>“how did you—“ </p><p>“a magician never reveals his secrets.”</p><p>”sephiroth, you aren’t a magician.”</p><p>he received no response as the silver haired man busied himself with inserting the disc into the CD player. they both sat back and intently observed the tv screen as it crackled to life. sephiroth and cloud had always been the quieter, more analytic members of their rag-tag group and often found themselves sitting in companionable silence. this time was no different however a voice from the tv soon broke that silence. </p><p>“<em>hey, i'm about to go meet up with zack and angeal, you wanna come with?</em>” a thirteen year old genesis rhapsodos appeared on the screen, holding the device in his hands carefully. cloud choked on practically nothing as he processed the young boy's appearance. long dark shoulder length auburn hair, glittering blue eyes, smooth fair skin and slender shoulders — genesis had always been unfairly pretty, even at a time which was meant to be awkward. </p><p>whoever was offscreen must have declined ( cloud saw sephiroth smile lightly ) because the younger version of the fiery redhead walked off ( not without a dramatic huff ). genesis steadily picked up the pace as the camera caught sight of two dark haired boys, one considerably taller than the other. </p><p>fourteen year old angeal hewley was staring down at an eleven year old zack fair. cloud blinked, amazed. “he's so short!” was the first thing that slipped out of his mouth. from beside him, sephiroth chuckled. </p><p>“<em>zack</em>,<em> what am i going to do with you? honestly...</em>”</p><p>“<em>you could give me a chocolate orange slice!</em>”</p><p>the camera shifted a little and zoomed in on angeal's hands, barely catching the unimpressed look that decorated his youthful face. zack's high pitched nervous chuckles could be heard in the background as the camera shook. cloud could barely make out a large ball of chocolate shaped like an orange, slices ready to be torn apart individually and all. angeal had apparently been carefully separating the pieces while zack had been pestering him. a laugh rumbled from behind the camera as genesis finally adjusted the position. </p><p>the camera focused in on the elder dark haired boy's face. cloud was almost taken aback by how beautiful the whole group were as children. they certainly didn’t look like they were on the edge of hitting puberty full force ( though they sounded like it ). angeal's brow was carefully furrowed and he looked up to make direct eye contact with the camera. a small smile broke out on his face before he returned to his polite inquisitive face. young zack was nervously hovering beside him before he, too, made eye contact with the camera.</p><p>the next few moments were a cinematic blur as genesis' startled shrieks — “<em><strong>ZACKARY FAIR!</strong></em>” — filled the air. the tv screen crackled almost menacingly and turned impossibly dark for a few seconds. cloud's jaw slacked. “is that the end?” he demanded. sephiroth said nothing, choosing to silently stare ahead. a faint “<em>zack stop that!</em>” broke through the unnerving radio silence and the camera whirled to face a frowning angeal. heavy breathing could be heard and a red pool of hair lay in the distance. cloud concluded that zack must have lunged for the camera and taken it from the dramatic genesis, who was now lamenting ( and inaudibly reciting LOVELESS no doubt ). </p><p>the chocolate imitation of an orange seemed to be long forgotten until the scenery shook rapidly ( zack's doing ). angeal sighed and looked down at the chocolate in his hands before shrugging. “<em>or i won't give you anything!</em>” he finally spoke. an ear splitting shriek of horror ( yes, it was zack ) finally cut the video short for good. cloud blinked.</p><p>”how did you know about this? scratch that, where were you during all this?” he turned to face sephiroth. <br/>
<br/>
the elder man only offered him a mysterious smile.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>THIS IS BASED ON A VIDEO MY FRIENDS AND I MADE WHEN WE WERE 12 AKSMKSMSJS IM FUCKIMGN PEEING<br/>it's slightly altered tho bc that video is exactly two seconds long<br/>lolololol content</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. why am i suffering because romeo couldn't keep it in his pants?</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>“well that only leaves sephiroth. who should we make him? rosaline?”</p><p>“nah. he can be the nurse!”</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>not edited so if u see mistakes, no u didn’t<br/>sorry it’s so short, i have one track mind</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“i hate romeo.” cloud said flatly as he walked into the living room. angeal's gaze snapped to the kitchen door immediately. “don't let <em>him </em>hear you.” he hissed warningly. however, mr strife was feeling very brave today. so he repeated himself. loudly. zack began a silent countdown with the fingers of his right hand ( the left hand was preoccupied with squeezing sephiroth's hand in excitement ) and the silver haired man beside him groaned. “genesis rhapsodos incoming in 3... 2... 1—“</p><p>“<em>WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU SAY?!</em>”</p><p>everyone averted their gazes immediately. everyone but cloud that is. he was not one to be cowed so easily. the tension was almost palpable as genesis and cloud stubbornly held a pseudo staring contest, neither willing to look away first. sephiroth sighed audibly. </p><p>“i hate romeo.” cloud repeated, caving in. the redhead smarted. “okay, why?” he questioned— no, <em>demanded</em> was more accurate. “you really want me to list why? he goes on and on about juliet and ditches rosaline after claiming to be in love with her, he threatens suicide but doesn't actually intend to go through with it, he's the reason mercutio died, he kills tybalt too late and ends up devastating himself and juliet, he's a little fucking pissbaby who can't do shit for himself—“</p><p>cloud paused for breath, cheeks flushed in uncharacteristic anger. 3/4 of the group stared back at him, eyes impossibly wide as they tried to comprehend what just occurred. genesis was less impressed and began firing back. “romeo and juliet are star-struck lovers, they are the embodiment of true love so obviously rosaline could not compare. he's a little histrionic but there is nothing wrong with that — romance requires passion! mercutio's death is unfortunate but people died all the time back then and tybalt had it coming—“</p><p>”genesis!”</p><p>”what?! these are fictional characters, ‘geal.”</p><p><br/>”and because they are fictional characters, we should not be quarrelling over them.” sephiroth interjected calmly. “yeah guys, it's not that deep!” zack added. the silver general rolled his eyes. “thank you zack, you have contributed much to this conversation with that single statement.” he prodded sarcastically. the younger man continued beaming, seemingly not picking up on the hidden intent. “hey now, how about we all sit down and talk about something else?” angeal tactfully directed the conversation topic away from romeo &amp; juliet as they all observed how realisation was beginning to dawn on zack's face.</p><p>cloud acquiesced and started up a debate with zack about the fastest breed of chocobos. the silver haired man gave his input here and there, acting more of a moderator than an actual participant. this left the childhood friends to enjoy one another's company. “say, ‘geal? who do you think cloud would be in romeo and juliet?” genesis whispered suddenly. his brows furrowed as he tried to recollect what had been beaten into his brain years prior. “probably juliet,” he responded. “they both are calm, level headed, respectful yet not pushovers and always mean what they say.” the redhead agreed.</p><p>”you can be benvolio and i'll be mercutio because you're diplomatic and gentle and i'm crude and provocative.” genesis declared. angeal turned to face him, amused. “my, what a startling bout of self awareness. at least you know you suck.” he joked. it earned him a sharp dig in the ribs but he decided it was worth it. “zack can be romeo.” angeal offered after a minute pause. genesis hummed.</p><p>“well that only leaves sephiroth. who should we make him? rosaline?”</p><p>they turned to face the trio before them. zack was excitedly reaching out for cloud, his hands forming a most impressive blur as his target was determinedly clinging onto the silver haired man's back for protection. sephiroth was caught up in the midst of a zackkura face off. the pained expression etched onto his face was almost enough to send the duo rolling in laughter. </p><p>“nah. he can be the nurse!”</p><p>they collapsed into a heap of childish giggles, very unbefitting of men of their age and position. </p><p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>very self indulgent i hate romeo keep it in ur pants bro</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
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